Art by Alex Bear
Our Favorite Vampires
It’s the frantic heartbeat, the rush of blood, and the allure of eternity. Vampires don’t care about your feelings, but they’ll listen to your thoughts and bend you to their wills. That duality of beast and babe makes them as sexy as they are monstrous. Is it Lestat or Louis? You could be hunted by Selene or ruled by Santánico Pandemonium. Or perhaps you prefer a comical Count, maybe the kiss of Morticia. Are you a horror-minded sycophant for Vlad or would you rather be a Slayer? Don’t worry, you can keep your Vampire Diaries a secret. We’ve listed our picks of deliciously deadly options, because vampires bite better—just don’t tell the werewolves. (signed, Sherin):
Marceline
from Adventure Time
Marceline is my kind of Vampire Queen—one who doesn’t need to drink blood to have a good time (I’m a squeamish girly, don’t come for me). Instead, she loves to consume anything red-colored, while rocking out on her battle-axe-turned-bass-guitar, and pulling off totally radical pranks across the land of Ooo. (Alex Bear)
Katrina
from Vamp
The modern mother of “I know I shouldn’t but…”. Katrina crawled so Akasha could fly. Vampires hate her because they ain’t her. (Philip Jean-Pierre)
Spike
from Buffy the Vampire Slayer
Yes, his creator is terrible (we made an episode about it), but our love for Spike is forever. His character arc went him from villain to bad boy to tsundere, launching fanfiction empires and turning fang-banger books into bestsellers. Based on the 80s rockstar Billy Idol, there will never be another hardhead, punk rocker, platinum-blond vamp who bleeds rizz the way Spike does—but if you find one, send up a flare, we want more. (Sherin Nicole)
Miriam
from The Hunger
“You’II be back. When The Hunger hurts so much you’ve Iost reason, then you’II have to feed, and then you’II need me to show you how.”
(Soma Brodhun)
Nadija
from What We Do in the Shadows
This 500 year old vampire seductress is a force of nature trapped in New Jersey with two idiot men (one of whom is her longtime love)—she keeps them in line as much as she can. AND she still has time to track down the reincarnation of her true love…create a living doll that holds a part of her soul…and generally be a sexy badass whose eye roll is to die for. (N. Renee Brown)
William Beckett’s Vampire Leader
from Fall Out Boy’s “A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More Touch Me”
William Beckett as the flamboyant vampire leader in the music video for Fall Out Boy’s “A Little Less Sixteen Candles, A Little More Touch Me”. This video came out 18 years ago and it’s still one of my favorites of all time, even though the plot has nothing to do with the lyrics (still a banger, though). Whomst among us wouldn’t want to be turned into a creature of the night by this dandy?? All I’m saying is there’s a very good reason the police in this video were corrupt/sided with the bloodsuckers. Special shout out to the other vampires including Brendon Urie, Travie McCoy, and our main character Pete Wentz. (Sam Devotta)
Mamuwalde
from Blacula
A vampire that’s been holding it down for the culture (when not feasting on the culture) since 1780. Blacula, two words: Cold Blooded (Philip Jean-Pierre)
Racquel
from Blade
Racquel is the first vampire we meet on screen in Blade. Pretty hot, even if she ends up turning to ash soon after her entrance. Ah well. (Drew Bittner)
Jerry Dandridge
from Fright Night
Jerry Dandridge is the villain of one of my favorite movies, Fright Night. [played by the always fab Chris Sarandon], Jerry is a sexy, charismatic monster who ensured that I never looked at a leather trench coat the same way again. (Angie Henry)
Count Von Count
from Sesame Street
Okay, I have to admit I’ve never quite been a vampire person and struggled to find one that I loved. And then my wife, Renee, reminded me of my very first vampire: Count von Count! (Day Al-Mohamed)
“Greetings! I am The Count. They call me the Count because I love to count things”.
Akasha
from Queen of the Damned
Akasha, Queen of the Damned, because, well, look at her… She slays, if only for the outfit alone. And the Queen Mother of the Vamps? Come on… (Monique Pearl)
Blade
from Blade
In CLOSE competition to Queen Akasha—really, kinda my number one—[but I feel like Aaliyah doesn’t get enough love]: Blade, the baddest Daywalker vampire and true father of the MCU. (Monique Pearl)
Jesse Hooker
from Near Dark
Vampire leader and caretaker for a ragtag, albeit psychotic, collection of chosen family. Also…psychotic. (Philip Jean-Pierre)
Count von Blood Count
from Transylvania 6-5000
The menacing Count von Blood Count, who menaces Bugs Bunny in a memorable 1963 short called Transylvania 6-5000. Bugs needs to use a phone but the Count has other plans. Memorable for “Rest is good for the blood” and “Asleep yet?” Also able to turn into a bat by saying “abracadabra” and back by saying “hocus pocus,” which Bugs uses to frustrate the poor fellow no end. “Abraca-pocus. Hocus cadabra! Oh, that’ll never work. Walla Walla Washington!” Not the most successful vampire on the list but he gave it the old Transylvania try. (Drew Bittner)
Claudia
from Interview with the Vampire – Season 1
Applause for this adolescent vamp who transformed my hate into adoration. I never liked Claudia in The Vampire Chronicles books. When she faced the sun, I’ll admit I giggled. The version of her in the 1994 movie was equally unsatisfactory. Another moment in the sun, another smile of schadenfreude. Ooh, but then 2022’s Claudia awakened to the “dark gift” from Zaddy Lestat, and SHE demanded ovations. Capricious, cruel, calculating, and yet deeply sympathetic (for a serial killer), this Claudia is claws-out and a worthy heir to the Queen of the Damned. (Sherin Nicole)
Kat’s Court
the unmissable incarnations
It’s very hard for me to pick my favorite vampire because each creator’s interpretations of this iconic creature have staked indelible marks on me since adolescence. The list would encompass: Anne Rice’s cunning Lestat and my OG emo sad boy Louis, to Buffy’s tragic hero Angel, to Skinner Sweet & Pearl Jones in the sweeping Western Gothic comic American Vampire, to Edvard Munch’s evocative Vampire painting. I’ve even got Kim Newman’s Anno Dracula series taunting me on my nightstand. So this is my roundabout way of stating vampires in all their incarnations are my favorite monsters. (Kat Bittner)
